Now, maybe it's just me, but I was under the impression that after I graduated from college that my life was going to happen. You know, like that the second I got my diploma, it was a signal to all those great things to come, to well, come. So far, I am 24, and I have yet to see anything materialize into something amazing, spectacular, wonderful, mindblowing, or fantastic. In all fairness, I would also settle for something normal-a steady boyfriend, a steady job, a steady homelife, a steady network of friends, a steady life. Currently, I have none of those. In fact, right now, life is at a stand still. I'm treading water in the vast pool of existance and not really getting a whole lot accomplished. I feel like a failure and there doesn't seem to be a anyone/thing telling me that I am highly mistaken on that front. Let's look at my situation:
On the boyfriend front: Now, being single is OK, sure. There are a zillion and one chick lit books out there about single girls who triumph over life and love and are happy and better for it. (Not that I read those books or anything, I think they're trash and automatically judge anyone as stupid if you read them, but whatever.) And that's great really. I would have no problem being single if it weren't for Facebook. Facebook is the devil, literally, because it constantly makes it its job to alert me when one of my sorority sisters gets engaged. Or my friends from high school. Or my teacher friends. Apparently, this is the time when all my friends get engaged and show off their bling and then get married and post a zillion and seven pictures of their dress and cake and bridesmaids and reception. Really it's just gross for those of us who semi-single. I say "semi" because I date a boy who I broke up with to date a boy who I met while he was wearing jorts. Yes, you heard me correctly. Jorts. I really thought I could fix him. But there is no fixing bad taste ladies. None at all, so don't try. You will be very disapointed. But his friends were fabulous, his parents would have made great in-laws and he was super hawt. You know, without the jorts. But I realized the error of my ways and am back with Original Boy. Who is fabulous, PS, he's just very anal and most of the time stresses me out. Do I love him? Yes. Do I think he would make a great husband? Yes, amazing. For me? I don't know. I do know that I am unsatisfied with said relationship and would like it fixed immediately, please.
J-O-B: I had my dream job-working for a political campaign. Except there was a change in management. And the guy we got, he sucked, BIG TIME. And treated me like I was expendable, ie: taking away my laptop after he gave it to me to ensure I wouldn't have to bring mine from home everyday, making me go to meetings after hours so that he could not listen to any of my suggestions or comments, not supplying any sort of gratitude after I pulled an all-nighter, literally staying at the office for almost 48 hours straight to save the campaign from a financial ficasco. I could go on, but I won't, because I like you. So, when I went to discus with him what the slight was for, he decided that it would be best if I was let go, with severence, which is nice, but further cemented the fact that he was 1. a jerk, and 2. my services would be better elsewhere. So currently, I do nothing, but hang out at the house and get fat, literally. I am the heaviest I have ever been, ever. I eat because I'm bored, not because I'm depressed. I need a job. Taking offers for ideas.
Home Sweet Home? I live with my aunt. Who's 57, but thinks she's going to die like tomorrow. She's crazy. She has had me go through her house and point out what I want her to will to me when she dies. I also can't tough anything it her house becasue "it's an antique. My (insert family member here) gave that to (insert another family member here). It's very valuable." Yeah, right. It's miserable. Since I have no job, I can't afford anywhere else, so don't ask why I haven't moved out.
So, those are really the highpoints of my life right now. All stimulating, I know. Or depressing, either way. So when does something exciting get to happen to me? I really thought by now I would have an AMAZING job, be in an AMAZING relationship, and have an AMAZING place to live. I would even take one of these to be simply good. So far, nada. And it's not like I'm not trying. I apply everywhere so that I can have said AMAZING job so that I can afford said AMAZING place to live. The boy I can settle taking a backseat right now, because I do semi-have someone. But currently, I am waiting. Waiting for my life to start.
I wanna dance with somebody.
15 hours ago
3 comments:
Hey doll
I look foward to keeping up with your blog, hope all is well with you and with Isabella (and as soon as Jay unbreaks the computer, I'll add you to my blog list)
Nic
not only will Rent be in Charlotte, it will have the original Mark and Roger (Anthony Rapp and Adam Pascal)!!!
Ok, first off, girl. Please keep writing. You are hysterical. I don't know if you meant to be funny or not, but if you didn't, all the more reason to keep writing. I so want to go hang out at Starbucks with you right now.
#2 - you need to meet my friend Annie. http://annieblogs.com/
#3 - Statistics say that when one or both partners are 28 when they get married, the marriage survival chances jump to 80%. Many, perhaps most, of your friends who are getting married right now will not be married in 5 years. That is sad but true. In my group of neighborhood mommy friends, like half of them were married at 23 and divorced by 24 or 25. Then around 29, 30 they married they guy they are still with and had babies with - because, no offense, but in my opinion, 22 year olds have NO BUSINESS picking out life partners. Because believe me, in ten years, you are not gonna be able to recognize yourself.
#4 - who told you that life began at 22? I mean, really, where did you get that load from? Because if it began at 22, by the time you were 30, you would be totally washed up. This is the time of your life that you are just feeling things out, you can get fired and yeah, it sucks, but it is not the end of the world, because you can always move in with your crazy aunt. At 24, that is so doable and normal. At 34, that's just pathetic and sad. Imagine if you met a guy who was 34 and he told you he was jobless and living with his aunt? Next...
#5 - This is the most important one. God has you EXACTLY WHERE HE WANTS YOU TO BE. Down to the tiniest detail. Don't be depressed. The movie that is your life is unfolding and it may not be going the way you thought it would but - guess what, none of our lives go the way we think they will. If my life had gone the way I wanted it to, I would be married to Eric McQuaid at 22. We would have been divorced very soon thereafter even though I LOO-OO-OOVED him. I probably would be a single mom. Who knows what kind of yuckiness would have ensued after that. As it is, God's plan for me was a million times better than my own.
As it was, I married at 32 - and am so, so, so glad. Altho if you had told me that at 22 I would have slit my wrists.
I have written a little about the angst of my 20s here
http://itsalmostnaptime.blogspot.com/2008/02/young-dumb-and-redeemed.html
and here
http://itsalmostnaptime.blogspot.com/2007/09/happy-birthday-walker.html
Ok, that's enough advice for one night from your crazy Aunt Missy. :)
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